Tuesday, December 27, 2011
So, I decide to take a picture of all three of my children; to capture the exhilarating joy and heartwarming charm of life with 3 little superheros. A photographic treasure by way of Norman Rockwell meeting Hallmark in the von Trapp mansion (minus the Nazis). Just a tiny time capsule of sweetness to brighten the dark winter ahead.
Yeah.........Here is what actually happened:
Saturday, December 24, 2011
Merry Christmas from the Awkwards!
Monday, December 19, 2011
Three is a magical number; good and glorious things come in threes. Clovers, trimesters, wise men, Musketeers, Bee Gees, cheers, crowds, coins in a fountain, stooges, triangle sides, Bronte sisters, Neapolitan ice cream, french hens, penny operas, traffic lights, bean salads, tenors, dimensions. The Trinity is pretty awesome. As is Three Dog Night and Three piece suits. Seriously, check it out: Peter, Paul, and Mary. Three Times a Lady. Faith, Hope, and Charity. Small, Medium, Large. The Lion, the Witch, and the Wardrobe. The Good, the Bad, and the Ugly. Snap, Crackle, Pop. Rock, Paper, Scissors. Life, Liberty, and the Pursuit of Happiness. And my three beautiful children. I can't stop thinking of threes, it is a truly magical number! And as with any magic, there is a dark side......
The villain Three is as powerful as he is subtle. A little extra, a little over two. Not hard, right? I can handle three, no problem.....no, no, readers. Yes hard, and yes problem. I can not handle three! Wanna know why? Three requires juggling. I mean, come on, juggling? Juggling, readers. And I have circus fears, as it is......
Here's how I figured it out; it has recently come to my attention that I only have 2 hands. 2 arms. 2 legs. 2 lungs. 2 eyes. 2 ears. Holy even numbers, Batman! What on earth am I going to do with three children? The math just doesn't work. Looks like I am gonna need to learn to juggle.
Now, happily for me, turns out that all parents already know how to juggle some. It is a super power that comes standard with all kid models, and even my rudimentary skills work quite well on the villain Three. In the house. I know my house; the layout, the distances, the DVDs that can mesmerize Super Preschooler long enough for me to get Super Toddler a cheese stick. I know the special car that the Super Toddler loves, which will buy me time to feed Super Baby. I know that if I put Super Baby in the swing and play one Timmy Time, I can take a shower, complete with shampooing and conditioning. In fact, one could say that I am a master of juggling. In the house.
However, if juggling in the house is like juggling soft little balls that fit perfectly in the hand, juggling outside of the house is like juggling knives....sharp ones that no one has ever put in the dishwasher...in fact, they take them to a tinker and have them sharpened on some bi-yearly schedule....knives that cut tin cans and quarters and whatnot....oh, and they are also on fire. No sane novice juggler in her right mind would attempt to juggle fire knives so early in her juggling career.
This is, of course, what I decide to attempt. Last Thursday. In the snow. At 12:30 pm. For no good reason; other than, Super Preschooler wants to make a gingerbread house. The Supers were all being good. Super Preschooler was sharing cars with Super Toddler. Super Baby was sleeping like an angel. The Super Cats hadn't thrown up on the rug in 2 days. I was sated from lunch; full of food and of my own vanity, but wherever blames lies, I decide it is a great idea to head to Target and get gingerbread house making kits.
And this, my good readers, is where we need to leave you. For the moment. Three was hiding out in the living room, watching Finding Nemo with everyone, but it seems he is bored. Super Baby is rousing from her nap, that smell is 1...no 2....diapers in need of changing, that melodious noise is Super Cat throwing up under the dining room table, the phone is ringing, and the laundry needs switching over. Must dash. Back super soon to tell you about the Target trip....but before we go, quick question: who has a polite response to the following:
Wow, are you having enough to start a baseball team?
Just having them all at once, eh?
Gonna get yourself a reality show, if you keep it up.
A juggling trifecta: crown, sword, X-men. Told ya great things come in threes.
Saturday, December 3, 2011
Super Baby is showing early mastery of Adorableness, Sweetness, and Eyes-that-make-you-want-to-give-her-just-about-anything. The super is strong with this one.
Super Toddler would like you to wait a moment and let him finish a couple slices; he promises that we'll be back just as soon as we can. Mostly to explain this:
Needless to say, there has been a great deal of adjusting, walking, dragon fighting, tent peeking, and rocking out lately. Stay tuned and if we are less than quick with new posts, just think of it as a hiatus. Feel free to read some old posts. Re-runs, if you will. We recommend the one where Awkward Mom totally embarrassed herself, which would be the one that starts with Awkward Mom vs....