Tuesday, September 6, 2011

Awkward Mom vs. the End of Summer

Despite the store ads proclaiming "BACK TO SCHOOL" that have been up for, oh, about 3 months now, Labor Day weekend and the unofficial start of fall took everyone here by surprise! Being as we in the Awkward Family view fall as an ally, with her cooler temperatures and crunchy apples (Summer's sweltering heat and requirements to wear bathing suits in public keep him on the villain end of things), this is usually a favorite time of year around here. However, it isn't every fall that Super Toddler changes identities and becomes Super Preschooler, and it isn't every fall that Awkward Mom is grotesquely unprepared for that.

Oh my. My baby is starting preschool in 6 days. What am I going to do? How am I going to feel? Think I can potty train him by then?

Fear not, gentle readers. It is only for 2 days a week and for 2 hours at a time and the teacher is already aware of the lack of potty training process going on in these here parts. So, really, all this transition amounts to is a change to his weekly routine and a change to his blog-sanctioned name. That's all. That's it. The whole shooting match. Right?

Oh, and well, a sign that the little baby I held in my arms just the other day (wasn't it last week? 3 years ago? Really?) is growing up faster than I would like. And with this, I join ranks with mothers across the ages. Sigh.

But more on this later. He doesn't start until next week, so I am gonna do what all sensible people do when faced with a change they don't particularly want to deal with. I am gonna change the subject! (And get some chocolate, hang on.)

OK. Back. And eating some of Awkward Dad's birthday chocolates. You won't tell, will you? Yes, Awkward Dad had a birthday this weekend! I won't tell you his age, as he is all in a tizzy about it. The Super Boys gave him a card, some stickers, multiple kisses, and the chocolates I am currently eating. We had Chinese food for dinner several nights this weekend, endured the zoo on Labor Day (making sure to see the ape house this time), and we generally let him have his way around here (a unprecedented feat).

Awkward Dad's birthday is usually Labor Day weekend and it is part of the hints around here that summer is ending and fall is on its way. So, I am going to use this time to shove every summer related post I didn't do this summer into this post (in picture form, of course). Enjoy!

We weren't very heavy on the milestones this summer. I have already mentioned Super Toddler's complete lack of potty training interest. Super Baby has followed suit with no interest in walking (in fact, he had an evaluation today and will be starting physical therapy in the weeks to come.....no doubt followed by freaked-out-Awkward-Mom blog posts). That said, the boy sure can climb stairs.

We took many trips to the park this summer, mostly with our good buddies, Awesome Toddler and Excellent Toddler. I will admit that I was a little deterred from the park after my run-in with the organic-brownie moms, but I persevered and continued to provide outdoor structures for my children to climb. My children, in turn, continued to provide me with plenty of adrenaline by climbing said structures backward, upside down, and way too close to the edge. That all my park pictures look like the one above is something I have no excuse for other than sheer laziness.

Ah, the pool. Although, it is really AH, the pool! (i.e. Do I really have to put on a swim suit and parade around in public? Really?) I valiantly took the Super Boys to the pool at least weekly for a good stretch there (that most of these outings were initiated by Excellent Mom will stay our little secret, eh?) and we (and by we, I mean, the Super Boys) enjoyed ourselves thoroughly, despite the presence of toy-stealers, splashers, and those moms who bring a whole picnic of healthful delicious food that causes your child to look with disfavor at the bag of goldfish crackers in his hand. Yes, despite the bikini wearing moms with 6-month-olds, the damp locker rooms with horror movie lighting, the bugs, the sunscreen in the eyes screams, the wet towels all over the car, the 2 hours of prep for 1 hour of pool time, the sunburns, the weird rash Super Baby got, the teenagers, the difficulty of explaining "adult swim,"and that encounter with that mom I hadn't seen in awhile who declared "you don't look pregnant at all" while we are wearing swim suits and swim suits clearly show everything and mine shows a belly that I think looks like a pregnant belly but I guess she just thought I had let myself go, it was a successful pool season. We did go to the Spray Park once, and you all know what a nemesis the spray park is for the Awkward Family. Well, this time, it wasn't that horrible and I did remember towels. What I forgot was Super Toddler's swim suit, so he went in a swim diaper and I was "that mom" in front of the whole play group. Oh well; when am I not "that mom" anyway?

The Awkward Family took one vacation this summer; we went to Cleveland to visit some college friends of Awkward Dad. This resulted in the climbing of hotel furniture, the delicate balance of eating out with childless friends, and an attempt to steal ZZ Top's car. Pretty standard, really.

There have been several trips back to the zoo this summer, although no more solo trips. Turns out Awkward Dad likes to be included in animal viewing. The zoo in the summer is, well, you know what the zoo in the summer is like; hot, crowded, and full of overpriced frozen lemonade (which Super Toddler has a serious love for). The upside is pictures like this one of Super Toddler dressed as a bee. Priceless.

And the rest of the summer looked like this:

Lots of shirtlessness, beating on things, bandaids, and one very memorable trip to the Science Museum. Lesson learned: the Super Boys are fans of electricity but not of animatronic dinosaurs or IMAX films about space. Ignoring this will result in screaming and stares from other parents. You have been warned.

Thanks Summer! And now, onward to fall! and preschool.....oh shoot, I need more chocolate....

Stay tuned, fearless readers, this fall should usher in a new age in the Awkward Family. The age of preschool. The age of Super Baby's first steps (we hope!). The age of Super Fetus' arrival. All of which will result in name changes all around; except for Awkward Mom, that is. No other name truly fits this Maven of Mischief, this Tireless Tripper, this Seeker of the Slippery Slope. Nope, she is just awkward. Join us for more awkward antics and adventures here, at the Adventures of Awkward Mom!


  1. Joe just started preschool today. He loves it (so far). Hope Will has a fantastic time :)

  2. Woo-hoo! Onward, Awkward Mom! You are an inspiration to all us normal people out there. Bikini wearing moms with six month olds, my eye. Playdate this fall?

  3. LOL it is too funny! You are soo right on with the pool!! I feel that way when I go and I have four kids! lol

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